Apartment Issues

When the time came for me to get my own place with my (now) fiancé, I immediately chose an apartment. I wanted something close to where we were living so I would feel comfortable in the area and something that was in a complex that I felt safe because of the lighting, and the general atmosphere and vibe I got when visiting. Looking back, I really wish we would have planned our move more and shopped around a bit. Seriously, houses right now are so cheap, it’s pretty insane. Not saying everyone can afford them right now, but if you can; now is the time! I have found so many houses in our area that are going for less than $200,000. I know that’s quite a bit of money but the monthly payments on them are cheaper than what we are paying for our apartment right now. Pretty crazy, right? Looking back, it’s upsetting realizing how many months we would have already been into our new house. I wish we would have been able to do it back then. But, the past is the past. I can’t wait until we are able to get into a house that is cheap. I’m so tired of apartments and all their problems. Right now we have a leaky toilet and the windows leak as well, which lead to mold if you don’t clean them all the time. I know things like this could happen at a house, but I’m just so sick of neighbors and having to be quiet. I want to be able to do our laundry at 2 in the morning if we want to, and play movies or music loud. It’s something to look forward to for sure! I’m very excited!

Anger Issues

I have had anger issues from as far back as I can remember. Living with my mom was really hard for me and she put so much fear into me that I began to act out and do things that I normally would have never done. I felt like the entire world sucked and that everyone was bad etc, etc. It took me quite some time to come out of that. And while I’m not completely back to “normal” (If you wanna call it that), I still have my moments and I know that I have a lot to work on. Talking to people about things like this  is extremely hard and not something that I like to do, but I know at the end of the day that the only way I’m going to feel better is by working on it and being completely honest. I try to talk with most people but in all honesty, the only person I feel really safe talking to about this stuff right now is my boyfriend because I feel that we are close enough that he will listen and do whatever he can to make me feel better. I love being with him and I’ve never been happier. It just sucks that so much random crap is getting in the way.

Okay, so maybe I'm not THIS bad lol..

I really can’t wait to start talking to a professional and getting help so that my boyfriend and I can have time to think about things without all the outside pressure from family etc.